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The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're
going to be when you kill them.
- William Clayton
A committee is a creature with three or more legs and no brain.
- Robert Heinlein
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
- Robert Heinlein
I am fairly unrepentant about her poetry. I really think that three quarters of
it is gibberish. However, I must crush down these thoughts, otherwise the dove
of peace will shit on me.
- Noel Coward on Edith Sitwell
Never mistake motion for action.
- Ernest Hemmingway
I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them.
- Jane Austen
This isn't right. This isn't even wrong.
- Wolfgang Pauli
Wisdom eventually comes to all of us. Someday it might even be your turn.
- David & Leigh Eddings
On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created
jerks.
- H. Allen Smith
She wore too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always
a sign of despair in a woman.
- Oscar Wilde
I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.
- Benjamin James
The nature of men and women - their essential nature - is so vile and despicable
that if you were to portray a person as he really is, no one would believe you.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Women want mediocre men. And men are working hard to become as mediocre as
possible.
- Margaret Mead
If people only knew how much I secretly hated them, they'd love me for holding
it in.
- Matt Groening
Wit is educated insolence.
- Aristotle
Disrespect cannot be commanded, it must be earned.
- Mat Taberner
They turned the country up on its side, and everything loose fell into
California.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the
power of speech.
- George Bernard Shaw
Your reality, Sir, is lies and balderdash and I'm delighted to say that I have
no grasp of it whatsoever!
- Baron Munchausen
I've had a wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
- Groucho Marx to Hollywood Hostess
In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.
- Woody Allen
He must have killed a lot of men to have made so much money.
- Moliere
Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.
- Ross MacDonald
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
- Fred Allen
An agile but unintelligent and abnormal German, possessed of the mania of
grandeur.
- Leo Tolstoy on Friedrich Nietzsche
The conventional view serves to protect us from the painful job of thinking.
- John Kenneth Galbraith
Drag a hundred-dollar bill through a trailer park - you never know what you'll
find.
- James Carville
I love mankind; it's people I can't stand.
- Charles Schultz
Not only is life a bitch, it has puppies.
- Adreienne E. Gusoff
Some people say that I must be a horrible person, but that's not true. I have
the heart of a young boy - in a jar on my desk.
- Stephen King
Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart
Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams.
- Mary Ellen Kelly
We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the
mental institution of the universe.
- Johann von Goethe
Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.
- Bertrand Russell
Insanity - a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
- R. D. Lang
A humanitarian is always a hypocrite.
- George Orwell
Producing satire is kind of hopeless because of the literacy rate of the
American public.
- Frank Zappa
Stay with me, I want to be alone.
- Joey Adams |
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